Summing-up Slow

2009-08-19

Wednesday, August 19, 2009 by Neil Pendock

Neil Pendock reflects on Robertson Slow, a long weekend of indolent indulgence in the valley of wine and roses.

Wine writers stick in the mud and not always for terroir reasons. I'll wager that lifestyle coverage of producers is in inverse proportion to their distance from Cape Town International. Which puts Robertson in the same league as coverage of Springbok bowls.

Which is a fat pity as some of the Cape's most dynamic winemakers are located in the valley of wine and roses, not to mention the country's most successful brand, Four Cousins (or Four Cousins and an in-law, as one wag corrected me).

But while they may be (relatively) remote, Robertsonians are certainly organized as my ticket for Robertson Slow was booked and paid for in February. They also have a critical mass of producers that some appellations (Agulhas, Orange River) have yet to achieve.

In fact Robertson boasts the most proactive wine route with the Whacky Wine Weekend and Robertson Slow just two examples of well-organized valley wide activities that make the three hour (thanks to perpetual road works) drive up from Cape Town International, worthwhile. As Hertz proves, being number two (to Stellenbosch in terms of wine tourism numbers) means having to try harder.

There is no free Organic Orgy, Gatsby Evening or Festival of the Pork with a singing Italian pig farmer, so as a partial quid pro quo, my thoughts (both positive and negative) on last weekend's festivities.

Plus Points:

Robertson is home to a plethora of larger than life characters: like "the man from Is, Abrie Bruwer"; Reuben Riffel direct from CNN TV studio into your Farmers' Market on Klipdrift farm; Almien du Toit who makes Oom Schalk Lourens look like a Trappist monk and many more.
Freshly squeezed orange juice at the aforementioned market at R10 a litre. OK, so each bottle had a couple of pips and none of that squishy pulp of the Woolies version, but it is nowhere near as acidic as a 2008 Stellenbosch Sauvignon Blanc.
No swine 'flu and all those outrageously beautiful mountains.
A box of second grade lemons for R5. The cardboard box costs more than that and lemon juice is darem lemon juice and not always a table decoration.
2009 whites with amazing acid and fruit balance across the board that make 2008 look positively second rate and Rennie-worthy.
An opportunity to ask locals (DGB TV ad style) for directions to the headquarters of the Broederbond plus a chance to bump into a former KWV director or chairman in the Spar.
Curious cultural curios like those Italian prisoner of war murals in the pigsty turned tasting room at Wederom.
Curious imported cultural curios like Nordic walking at Wolvendrift which "activates more muscles because of a longer stride and the pole swing is an enhancement of normal opposing arm swing." Or being welcomed by hosts in Dirndl and Lederhosen at Guba's De Hoek.
The sheer diversity of activities on offer: from visiting "a home for destitute donkeys" (plus the chance "to collect genuine donkey manure to take home"), tractor trips galore plus a meal at the splendidly named Jan Harmsgat on which "President (of the short-lived Swellendam Republic) Hermanus Steyn could have dined on."
An amazing organic solera-style Port with unexpected flavours of watermelon and raisins made from Touriga Naçional by Roelf du Preez at Bon Cap.
Negatives:

Most tasting rooms were closed on Sunday in the middle of Slow.
Cape Town SUV drivers definitely need courses on dirt driving etiquette. It's not polite to overtake at high speed to avoid driving in someone else's dust trail. Hello! This is a SLOW weekend.
The locavore message has yet to percolate through all layers of the mille-feuille. We all love Italian truffle oil but let's substitute olive tapenade this weekend and local pork for Parma Ham.
Hacks outnumbered punters at many functions. While traveling hedonists are much more fun than the hangdogs lurking in their Kenilworth kennels, we're all writing in the same fast evaporating lagoon of lifestyle publications, so some kind of apartheid-era influx control might be needed.
While boerekos is very lekker, is it really necessary that everything is so soet? When the rooibos-infused brandy gives you a diabetic rush, the pomegranate juice is sticky and the beetroot salad is more sweet than sour, you know Mr. Hulett is back in town, bigtime.
There was perhaps too much emphasis on over-the-top food with everyone offering gastronomic blowouts. "Oh for a simple sandwich" complained my stomach on day III.
A map of downtown Robertson would help or failing that, a street address for Reuben's new Robertson Small Hotel.
Does anyone have wines older than current release?
Does Robertson make brandy?
There are 51 other weekends in the year.